Kelly says he had a suicide attempt on the phone with Megan Fox: 'I just snapped.'

Contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255, text "STRENGTH" to the Crisis Text Line at 741-741, or visit suicidepreventionlifeline.org if you are considering suicide.As part of his opening up to the public, Machine Gun Kelly is sharing his struggles with mental illness.He gives fans a behind-the-scenes look into his personal life in his new Hulu documentary Life in Pink, which premiered Monday. Halfway through the film, the star (born Colson Baker) proposes to Megan FoxAs a result of the death of his father in 2020, he has fallen into darkness.In the film of his father, who died on the one-year anniversary of the release of his Hotel Diablo album, he says, "I flew to my dad's apartment to sort through all this stuff. I had this really weird interaction with this neighbour who told me all these things I didn't want to hear." "That really fucked me up because I couldn't get closure. I wouldn't leave my room and it got really, really dark."

During Megan's shoot in Bulgaria, I had this really wild paranoia. I kept getting paranoia that someone was going to kill me. I'd always sleep with a shotgun next to my bed, and one day, I just f------ snapped.""I called Megan, and I was like, 'You aren't here for me,'" he said. The shotgun is in my mouth and I'm yelling on the phone, and when I go to cock the shotgun, the bullet jams, and Megan is like dead silent."He realized afterwards that something "wasn't right" with how he felt after experiencing the frightening moment.He recalls that Fox, 36, and Baker's 12-year-old daughter, Casie, expressed concern for him."They said, 'I want to be able to see in your eyes.

I don't want to talk to you through a veil anymore. I want to see you as my father and as my husband-to-be,'" he says in the doc. It was like, 'I need to quit drugs for good this time.'"Over the past few years, the star has been open about his ups and downs. In an interview with Interview magazine in December 2020, he revealed that he was seeking therapy for his struggles.Rather than committing to a vice that I believed made the art, I currently choose happiness and commitment to the art," he said at the time. He said, "I'm taking steps.Last Thursday, I had my first therapy session. The dichotomy between Machine Gun Kelly and Colson Baker is too intense for me."

As part of his Hulu documentary, he also discusses Fox's positive influence on his life. Described by him as the sun he revolves around, Megan gave him life and helped him grow. "It's like every fairytale you've never heard in school. As the passion between us is otherworldly. I know I've known her in so many lifetimes."Following their meeting on the set of Midnight in the Switchgrass in July 2020, the couple got engaged in January this year and sealed their relationship by drinking "each other's blood."Machine Gun Kelly's BBMAs performance is dedicated to his wife Megan Fox and their unborn childPEOPLE reported shortly after the couple got engaged that those who know the couple weren't surprised. An insider said they had been talking about it for some time. Their love was very much love at first sight situation. They spend every waking moment together."Recently, Kelly talked to PEOPLE about the pair's relationship and revealed their last romantic moment took place overseas. He recalled slow-dancing to Frank Sinatra in Italy. Our last activity was probably drawing each other the way we see each other at a table. "It just happened spontaneously."